LIFE UPDATE


I cannot believe not only how fast this month has gone but how fast the year is going. I don’t know if this is the case for everybody else or if it is because it’s my first full year out of education and in full time work but jeepers it’s flying! It felt like yesterday I was creating my 2018 goals, anyway already so much has happened this year.

That being said, today I want to provide you with a little life update as the last few months have been a bit hectic. In April I felt really behind on everything and felt disappointed how the year had started and now things are starting to look up.

I also explain it all in my video if you’d prefer to watch that…

A change in job

So the biggest change recently was a new job, I haven’t got a lot to say on this subject as I am only in my fourth week in but so far so good. This will be my third job of the year and I felt worried about this as when I am applying for a mortgage they might not see stability, however I think it is so important to find a job you are happy in and respected in rather than worry about stability and pay slips. The only thing left to do is purchase some snazzy new office wear…

Extra work

I always go by the phrase ‘a busy schedule is the best kind of schedule’ and that is my life right now. As well as my full time job in an office 9-5:30 I have also decided to support people with disabilities. As you may already know autism is something so very close to my heart and I have a passion to help others with it. Since helping other people there it has also helped me learn things about my sibling and already I have learned different skills to help him along his journey, but I have also shared me experiences and skills with other families and that is something that means a lot to me. Whilst I have no children and I have the time on my hands to do extra work that I in fact LOVE I just thought why not?!

Health

Unfortunately, the month of May wasn’t the best for my health and I am still not right now, but it’s looking better. I started off the beginning of May with a swollen eye and no vision in it, after being admitted to hospital it was confirmed that it was in fact an eye ulcer which I am still receiving treatment for. I also received a horrid throat infection and virus which again wasn’t how I’d have liked the month to start. I have recently had the nasty sick bug so I’m hoping that’s all my yucky germs gone for the year! Despite the poor health I am feeling positive and excited to get back to my normal productive self this month.

Saving

To end on a positive note, just a quick update on how the saving is going – so far so good! I am pretty happy with how much I have saved this year and hope that I continue to do so. Starting saving has made me realise how much you can actually save if you really want something let’s just hope I get my something at the end.

 

Love, Jasmine xxx

 

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When Someone You Love Has Anxiety


Nowdays anxiety is well known and talked about subject, yet it still remains a taboo topic on those dealing with a loved one who suffers with this. Anxiety; confusing, intrusive and frustrating for them and us, the ones watching our loved ones fight a battle.

But do we really know what it’s like for them?

Yes we all have our own daily ‘struggles’ – some may be different to others.

But the struggles we face seem so miniature compare to the dilemma those with mental health problems.

Whether it be confidence, body image, unhappiness – there is always a way we can make someone’s world a better place just by understanding.

When someone you love has anxiety their thoughts are probably similar to this:

Are you laughing at me?

You might often hear the wrath in their voice when they ask you why you’re laughing at them when you are in fact not laughing at all or you may have laughed at somebody else in your household. Of course it gets frustrating the fact you can’t even have a joke in your household without getting accused, but do you think they really want to accuse you? Sometimes the person you love actually does think you are laughing at them when often you are laughing with them. The best thing to do in this scenario is of course reassure them but it is likely that they won’t believe you and in that case change the subject completely to something that they like talking about and if they are really annoyed by this point give them their own space. I bet you bottom dolla that they’d have forgotten about it by the time you come to making them a cuppa later!

Don’t take things personally

Sometimes you might have to divert the route you have set because caring for someone with anxiety requires a lot of flexibility. Something that is so neutral and easy to us like popping to a shop can deem a massive threat on those with anxiety. It’s upsetting when all you want to do is go out with your loved one and they promise you over and over but break that promise every time. In these circumstances, the best advice I can give is don’t take things personally it’s not you! Put yourself in their shoes (although easier said than done) because we don’t know exactly the feelings they are going through; however, I am sure that they really do want to go out but their anxiety is putting a hold on this. Never give up because thousands of rejections might lead to one YES and for as long as they say no to you – just know they are not, they are actually saying no to a potential anxiety attack.

We all love a bit of praise

Now you’re 100% lying if you say you don’t get a bit of a cheesy grin when someone praises you. Whether it be going out in the garden for the first time in a while, whether it be getting out of bed or cooking a meal – the littlest things deserve the maximum praise for someone with anxiety. I often find praising my loved one can encourage them and allow them to take miniature steps. Praise praise praise whenever you can!

Accept them for who they are

Don’t try to change them – you’ll more than likely want to tell them to stop overthinking and being stupid but try your best not too because remember that’s them not you. Don’t let on that you’re worried about them and most definitely don’t tell them not to worry because that’s like telling someone that the sky is green and the grass is blue. Always allow yourself to be available to speak to, but more importantly treat them as you would anyone else and ensure that they know there are more than enough.

Finally – know that you are their rock

When you feel like giving up and walking away just know that the person that is giving you a hard time and making life 100x more difficult for you is not them purposely doing it – their anxiety has taken over. Proving that you are there for someone that faces everyday struggles makes you wiser, kinder and a stronger person. Believe me you’ll find no better connection in the world than it. And when they don’t show the love and appreciation it is purely because they cannot, but know that to them you’re their world, the person they depend on morn, noon and night and that they are so very grateful for your support. Being someone’s rock however does mean that you do deserve a break and when you feel that you require this break – have it and enjoy it – and I bet you’ll miss dealing with your loved ones dilemma and be ready to get right back to it!

Love, Jasmine

xxx

BANK HOLIDAY SNAPSHOTS

I’m sat here with a horrible eye infection as well as a throat and viral infection so as you can imagine pretty rotten. Bank holiday feels like a ages ago now because this week is really dragging with being ill, but I had a faaab weekend surrounded by loved ones so I thought I’d share some snaps with you…

On Saturday morning, I opened the blinds and it looked lovely and sunny so I put a summer outfit on and arranged a picnic. After popping to the local shops to purchase the picnic stuff, I soon realised it was quite cold and foggy so the picnic was off the cards. Instead, we went for breakfast and coffee. Luckily in the afternoon it brightened up a bit (as you can see in the photo of the gorgeous blossom) so me and Ryan met my grandma and little cousins and went to a summer fayre.

Lot’s of ice cream and pancakes were consumed.

After eating my bodyweight in pancakes and ice cream, I then ate lot’s of BBQ food at my friend Holly’s. Saturday night was a mega pamper night, Hol did my nails, tan and blow dried my hair for me (I hate doing my own) so thankfully I have the greatest friends. I arrived home that evening to watch the boxing with my brother which I was very disappointed in because I really wanted David to win.

I usually go for nude or red but this colour just says summer!

 

On Sunday I had to be up early because me and the other ladies had to be at the train station for 12:30. I woke up to glorious sunshine so I took my baby cousin on a stroll along the prom with Ryan and the dog. By 10:30 that morning I was drinking prosecco and getting ready with Georgia and Holly, and then the rest of the day was spent in Chester sipping cocktails and embracing the beautiful weather and company.

Gin or tea?

 

For anyone that knows me will know I suffer really bad with hangovers so when I woke up without one on Monday I was extremely happy. I spent the day with friends in a beer garden but I only drank coke (well behaved eyy).

With the weather being lovely my Grandma and Grandad decided to do a BBQ so that was perfect to have family time. When the sun went down I started to feel a bit under the weather and my eye was irritating me. Lusius was also poorly so we both snuggled on the couch.

What a perfect way to end the bank holiday. I hope everyone had a lovely weekend xxx

 

This Weeks To Do List….


Not sure about anyone else, but bank holiday weekend really threw me off track. It was my intention to not worry about food, money and alcohol that weekend but somehow I’m still in that frame of mind. I have spent all of last week struggling to get up and eating chocolate in bed. Doing no exercise has made me feel really drained – it’s funny isn’t it you think little things like skipping the gym won’t harm you when in actual fact it makes you feel like utter crap.

Doing dry January kind of changed my perception of alcohol, I felt so fresh and motivated that whole month and surely that’s because no alcohol touched my lips. I’m not somebody who can give up alcohol fully because I do enjoy a drink but drinking three days last weekend has definitely made me realise how unproductive alcohol makes you.

Anyway this week my aim is to get back on track and in to some sort of routine…

Cooking and eating healthy again

So now that I have got rid of all the chocolate bunnies I can now eat a lil bit better. Today I have done a food shop and cooked up some healthy stuff for the week. With working full-time, I really appreciate my slow cooker so that will 100% be out this week – if anybody has any slow cooker recipes please throw them over to me.

Breakfast

Having skipped breakfast, I have been absolutely shattered, I never realised how much a good coffee and breakfast wakes you up. This obviously includes getting up earlier which is something that has been a huge struggle for me the last few days.

Exercise

I actually love walking my dog and especially now the nights are lighter, instead of hopping back into bed when I get home from work I am going to go to the gym and get back into my fitness classes, and also go on some strolls with my gorgeous little pooch again (let’s hope the weather is in my favour).

Get back into positive thinking

Although I’ve been reading a positive book this week, I’ve just not really been in the positive mind-set and honestly it is difficult to try and be positive all the time. I think chocolate had a huge part to play in this, I actually sat in bed eating chocolate thinking about how much weight I was going to put on. Last night I actually felt excited for what’s to come – and I also realised that taking one step at a time is so important (I will be doing a blog post on this for sure). Patience is a virtue… and that is something that I will keep reminding myself this week/year.

Organisation

My head falls off when I’m not organised, I love keeping organised and having a plan so when I don’t have one my whole weeks goes to pot. My intentions are to have my bag ready the night before, know exactly what I am having for my meals, and have a clear structure of the week in my head.

Hope everyone has a lovely productive week.

 

xxx

10 Things My Mum Taught Me…

So, I guess it’s true when they say mum’s are always right, but as a teenager we never ever want to admit that. Moving away from home and going to university I definitely realised that mum’s bloody are always right. My wonderful mother has taught me all the things I know today and shaped me into the person I am. Therefore, I wanted to take this opportunity to thank my mum on my blog and share with you all 10 things that the lovely lady taught me… 

1) Family is the most important thing in the world

We are a huge family, well in our house there is only four of us but if you include the rest of the family we are biiiig. However, there is not one of us that isn’t close. I have learned to always put my family first because I’ve seen how family orientated my mum has always been and that is something so special.

2) Forgive but don’t forget 

This is probably the biggest life lesson, it is so easily to trust people because we live in a world where we think everybody will treat you kindly – it’s not always the case. My mum is probably the only person that I 100% trust and tell everything. Forgiveness is definitely key to life, but never forget.

3) Never wear white to a wedding

Bit of an odd one haha, but I never forget a few years ago I had a wedding and I had purchased a white dress to wear – that was a big NO NO from my mum. She came with me to the shop to take it and back and helped me pick something else.

4) Work ethic

In all honesty I have never ever met somebody with a work ethic like my mum. The only way to describe her is super woman. Every single day she wakes up gives my brother his breakfast, sorts his medication, goes to work and comes home makes his dinner and sorts him out, goes back to work and then comes home and does tea and the next lot of meds while doing everything in between. Growing up and watching how hard my mum has always worked has drove me to strive to do my very best. In university, I worked my butt off to ensure I got the best grade I could possibly get and also worked as a carer to pay my rent. I did it and I have never been so proud, but this was all because I had watched my mum’s work ethic.

5) Always be kind – you never know what someone is going through.

You think if someone is smiling they are ok? You think if someone is out and about they are fine? You think if someone is in work it’s all good? Unfortunately, it’s not always the case and people could be fighting a battle we are unaware of. My mums has always ensured that we believe in this. My favourite quote of all time is…

“In a world where you can be anything, be kind”

 

6) Tidy Space = Tidy Mind

I mean I don’t think I will ever be as tidy as my mum (I have a lot of my dads ways haha) and when the couch calls it calls. Me and Kyle have always lived in such a clean house, our mum actually hoovers every day which is very annoying on a Sunday morning. Being in university, I realised exactly why mum has always cleaned because it actually does make you feel better. I loved washing my clothes when I lived in Manchester and hanging them on the line (adult life). My favourite smell ever is my mummas washing – really though is there anything quite like the smell of your mum’s washing?! Cooking and tidying has probably become one of my hobbies after watching my mum for 22 years.

7) Stay strong & keep your head up

I’m not quoting Ben Howard there, I’m quoting Sarah Thomas-Rigby. What a strong woman she is. She watches her son struggle on a day-to-day basis and still manages to smile and care for everybody else. If something upsets my mum she won’t dwell on it she will get on with it. It is very rare that I will see my mum shed a tear, and not that crying is bad it’s actually good. I always cry (I get my emotional side from my dad). My mum’s sheer and determination in life has allowed me to always be strong and stand my ground, when I get knocked down and told I’m not good enough I will come back up fighting to be better than ever.

8) Never keep anything from your mum

Made a mistake? Tell your mum. Need to go on contraception? Whether you are underage or not tell your mum. Somebody upsets you? Tell your mum because nobody is going to protect you like her. Anything in the world, just tell your mum. Of course, you always want to be the apple of your mum’s eye and never let them down, but a mum is made to be understanding, they are your mum they’ll love you no matter what. When I wanted to go on contraception the first thing I did was tell my mum, she wasn’t cross in fact she actually took me. I hope one day when I become a mum I will be just as understanding as my mum is, and that my children will be able to confide in me. I really think being able to tell your mum everything is the key to a special bond.

9) It’s OK to let go of an opportunity if it doesn’t make you happy

My mum has never ever pushed me into anything, she always said to do what made me happy. “If you don’t want to go to university do go” Fortunately, it was a choice I was happy with, but if I wasn’t my mum never would have judged. For me happiness is so important, and more than ever now I am finally choosing to let go of things that do not benefit me or make me happy. Again, choosing happiness rather than impressing others is another lesson from my beautiful mum.

10) Never forget where you came from

Although this is something I have learned from my mum, she got it from my Grandma because it is something my Grandma has always drummed in to us. Another one is, there are good and bad everywhere, that is always repeated in our household. Whether you are the bloody Prime minister or the Queen it doesn’t make you more of a person that anybody else, we all have good and bad qualities. WE are all human. Something I will never forget is where my roots are.

Thank you, Mum, for being a teacher, the best secret-keeper, a strong and determined woman, and most of all thank you for sharing all your life advice with me and helping me shape into me. Whoever I am, and Wherever I go, it’s all because the love and guidance you provided me with along the way.

Happy Mothers day wonderful people, I hope you all enjoy your day.

xxx

 

 

 

5 TIPS TO AVOID NEGATIVITY

Now this isn’t a lecture post where I’m telling you never listen to negativity or be negative again, but don’t you just wish sometimes after a mood swing you could rewind. Believe me I’m not all smiles strolling down the streets – I get my down days like many, but I am slowly trying to avoid negative things, people, thoughts whatever it may be. Avoiding the negative bug is proving difficult but I’m gonna give it a good go so without further ado…

1) Avoid negative people

Easier said than done because there is always one moaning mertal and yes sometimes it can be me on the odd days (so that day avoid me) no really I wouldn’t blame you – please do. Anyway, the point is if you are getting negative vibes from someone well then their negativity is going to rub off on you so ditch them and their negativity. If you can’t avoid them then try to be optimistic and turn their negatives into your positives.

2) Don’t be scared to follow your dreams

Step out of your comfort zone and do you, it doesn’t matter what other people think as long as you are happy. One part of me worries like hell what other people think but then there’s another more adventurous part that doesn’t give a crap what people think, believe me I wish I could choose that half to make the whole. I get stuck into a routine and I don’t really like change, and in all honesty the past couple of years have been a lot of fluctuation so you’d think I’d be used to it by now. I’m not. Will I ever be? I don’t know. But what I do know I will always push myself to achieve my goals despite others and their opinions.

3) Say NO

You’ve probably seen this pop up a lot in my blog posts, and I am still learning. The key to avoiding negativity is not doing something you don’t want to do, never push yourself to please someone else. Don’t get me wrong we’ve all done something for the sake of someone else’s happiness, but in reality who’s happiness is more important? How can you make someone else happy if you’re not happy? One thing I have taught myself is that it is essential for me to know my priorities,  for example if I am looking after my brother or want to spend time with him then I need to learn to say no to going to a coffee shop with my friend without feeling guilty. If I want to spend the weekend with my boyfriend rather than going to get drunk with the girls then that’s ok too, it doesn’t mean I’m a bad friend. Sod the ‘she spends too much time with him’ if that’s who I want to spend my time with I will. If they are your true friends they will always understand and if they don’t then they aren’t true friends. (By the way I don’t always ditch night outs with my gals I do love a good cocktail catch up really) but sometimes if I’m not feeling it I won’t be afraid to say no.

4) Don’t compare yourself to others

Social media makes it a bit difficult to not compare yourself to others especially when you see stunning bikini pictures or amazing flat lays and somebody with thousands of followers, but if you compare yourself then your never going to feel good enough. Set your own milestones and hit each one for you and only you don’t do it to be like anyone else or impress anyone else. Of course acknowledge other people and their work and take inspiration but ensure you don’t question yourself. If you know you are doing your best then that’s all that matters – always believe in yourself.

5) Accept that not everybody is going to be a fan of you

It’s not a nice feeling to not be liked, but do you like everyone you come across? I bet the answer is no. So how can we expect everybody to like us? I’m a naturally loud and confident person and I bet that can bug others, and that’s absolutely fine because I’m not going to be everybody’s cup of tea likewise everybody isn’t mine. A massive thing that blogging has taught me is that not everybody is going to support you or like the stuff you do. I have received negative comments but they are nothing compare to the positive ones. Throughout my blogging process I have come to realise that it’s the people I would have expected to support me that don’t bother yet strangers and the people you don’t expect offer great support. Crazy world we live in eyy?

THE TIPS

Blog until your heart is content, whether it be someone laugh at it or love it – you’ve done what you wanted to do.

Follow those dreams – ditch your job if it’s not your dream one and reach or what you want to do.

Smile if someone throws negativity at you.

As the old saying goes…  those who mind don’t matter, and those whose matter don’t mind.

No Negatives Vibes please…

over and out x

 

The Real Reason I’ve taken a blogging break this week…


Anybody that knows me or that keeps up with my blog and social media knows that majority of the time I am posting on my blog at least 2-3 times a week, I try my best to work on my website everyday whether it be writing content or taking pictures. I get home from an 8 hour shift and I am straight back to my desk typing away and don’t get me wrong I bloody love it, but sometimes we all need a break even from the things we adore. This week I’ve felt down in the dumps and also haven’t been able to eat properly because it feels like I’m swallowing razor blades, yet despite feeling groggy that isn’t actually the reason I have taken a blogging break this week. Here is the real reason…

MY BROTHER IS.

On Sunday I arrived home around tea time, I went straight into my brother who welcomed me with the loveliest smile and said that he had missed me (I’d only been gone for a night) but still. I sat on his bed and we talked for a while and told each other  jokes – I was laughing and best of all so was he.

People reading this that have siblings might think well yes that’s what brother and sisters do laugh and fight. For me, it’s a little different because some days I get home from work and my brother hasn’t moved out of his bed all day and looks so pale and depressed.  I can barely get a conversation out of him a lot of the time so the days that I see him so very happy and talkative I cherish it – which is why this week I decided to take a break.

After having a typical chat on Sunday we went downstairs and he taught me some boxing – that is when I caught in the corner of my eye a glimpse of my dad’s smile. Both my mum and dad looked so happy and relieved that Kyle was out of his room and laughing with us all.

That night I lay in bed thinking about what a beautiful evening I had with my brother, I thought about how difficult it must be for him to feel so alone – in fact I thought many of thoughts. I had a sudden sense of guilt that I come home from work every day to blog, and I know my brother is completely fine with that because he wants me to do what makes me happy but a little bit of guilt sprung upon me. So, I decided that this week my time would be dedicated all to him. And that is the real reason I haven’t blogged or been on social media as much this week!

And what a fantastic week we have had.

From boxing training in our living room to sitting watching the National Television Awards with a tub of Ben & Jerrys it was all bloooomin fun.

Not only has it been a fun week but it has been a blessing for me to see my brother smile for more than one odd day and to hear him laugh for several more days.

Oh and may I add I am still bloody praising him despite him waking me up at 2am, 4am and 5:30am every night to ask me random questions like: his date of birth or if I want a Jaffa cake!! A bloody Jaffa cake at 4am.

So to anyone that has got this far…

Be there for someone whether they have mental health or not.

Drop your exercise class for a night.

Drop cooking tea – get a takeaway.

Drop cleaning your bathroom – do it tomorrow.

Drop scrolling through social media – look at someone and talk to them instead.

Be there for your loved ones – you never know when you might need someone to be there for you.

xxx

 

Monthly goal review

Ok so pretty ‘naff’ month with my goals. I started this month with motivation to achieve my set goals unfortunately this was not the case. However, I did achieve some plus there’s always next month.

Embrace Wales

With working full time and having quite a hectic month it’s been quite difficult to do this and I haven’t really explored somewhere new yet. However, I did go to London and explore when attending my first blogging event.

Bedroom Makeover Continue reading

Starting University – My Advice

I am officially a graduate – still sounds weird. It became official on Friday 21st July and it already seems like a lifetime ago. Is it just me that thinks this year is flying? Anyway, considering it’s that month of September where the whole routine makes a comeback I thought it would be a good time to reflect on my three years at university and share my tips and advice with you guys…

1. It’s ok to admit you are scared/ anxious/ lost

More than likely you will be moving away from home. Now if going somewhere new on your own isn’t a scary thought I don’t know what is. I remember packing up my stuff ready to leave my home that I had never left longer than 10 days, and I felt a whole load of emotions. I was shouting at my mum, hugging my boyfriend goodbye, and smothering my pup. I think the hardest part is actually getting and the car and going. Once I was on my way my sadness turned to excitement and I was ready to start my new journey. But having that cry and breakdown before I went was ok because I was able to admit my feelings. I guess it was better to do it around people who loved me rather than having to deal with it later on my own.

2. Leave your comfort zone and make new friends

Don’t be afraid to hang around in the kitchen and introduce yourself to your new flat mates you’ll feel much better rather than being sat on your own. My biggest tip is find somebody on your course and message them to meet this was a life-changer for me! Just by searching someone on Facebook I made a friend for life and felt much more at ease knowing I had somebody to walk with and talk to on my first day. Continue reading