Ok, let’s be honest social media has become the ‘big thing’. Is there a time we’re really off it? Whether it’s to avoid the chores that have to be done or you don’t want to get out of bed so scrolling through your friends, aunties, mothers Facebook is the easiest option.
If you want to know something about sport, he will tell you the name of the person that plays for what team. He’ll even tell you the date they joined if you have a tendency to know.
If you ask him about a holiday, he will tell you it was to Portugal 2011, and on the Thursday we went to watch Barcelona play and they won 3-0. The last time he ate prawns was on a Friday 4 years ago, but he didn’t like the texture. He is one of a kind with the most wonderful abilities.
He is caring. He is funny. He is him.
His ways are not like mine and not like many, his unique ways often get seen as ‘weird’.
My brother has autism.
Acceptance wasn’t easy. The typical words of certain teachers saying he’s not as well behaved as you or he doesn’t take after you, the look on my friends / boyfriends face when they first heard the funny noises he would make.
To compensate for the disability, I decided I needed to be the best at everything. For as long as I remember, I dreamt about going to university and making my parents above and beyond proud. I wanted to be that clever child that people didn’t expect. To me, I could be the only ‘proof’ that my parents were good parents so that other people didn’t judge. Let me tell you I could not have been more wrong…
To be that person dealing with a disability on a day-to-day basis means every day is something different. One day it’s chaotic the next it’s rewarding. You grow up before your time. I remember a friend saying to me you’ve grown up far too quick, but I always had that motherly instinct. I felt like in school I needed to be there for him. Why has he had no dinner? Why is he walking around on his own? Sometimes I love him and sometimes I hate him and that’s ok. You have to change a lot – maybe put your phone on silent or change the time you shower so it doesn’t interrupt his routine. However, the life experiences you gain turn you into a caring and independent adult who knows the true value of family.
I have always been a confident person; I could talk the legs off a donkey (literally). So, trying to understand and accept that my brother didn’t want to hang out with friends or go out anywhere was difficult. At times, I often felt confused how somebody could be so scared to talk to other people (I mean I loved it). I didn’t understand why he didn’t want a phone – I couldn’t part with mine. I wondered and still do wonder on his bad days if he does hate his big sister, but then an hour later he wants a movie night with me. I didn’t understand why he looked so normal but he didn’t act what is judged as ‘the norm’.
What I don’t question is will he be ok? Because I know he will be. He has faced challenges that I myself and you will probably never face. He is a blessing that has made me more aware of all the differences around us. Because of him I am a more patient, kind and helpful lady.
Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are; accepting that each individual is different and some a little bit more different makes you a better person. At no time is anyone above you. Disabilities unravels feelings and emotions, you never know where the tunnel ends, but you walk with your family and travel the distance. My parents are the most inspiring, caring and loving people and with their determination and persistence, Kyle and I have grown up as strong young adults with respect, love and loyalty.
To him, you are you. Don’t you ever change. The crazy outbursts you have has made us stronger. You have defined caring and family for me. By your side I will always stay.
To any siblings, you are brave and your mum and dad love you just as much, but your sibling needs that extra bit of attention. Keep being bold and brave. You do get your rewards; they are your reward.
If anybody would like a chat about having some in your life that has a disability, please contact me so we can share our stories and tips.
Does anybody have any positive memories or tips on being a sibling to someone with autism?
I’m currently saving for my trip to Thailand in November so unfortunately haven’t really been able to treat myself. But, we can all wish can’t we?
I’m almost ready to leave the summer clothes behind now (not that we’ve had much of one) maybe better luck next year. On that note, I am ready for the autumn items to start making their appearance. I have been seeing a lot of comfy-looking jumpers – perfect for my Sunday chill days.
My usual holidays would be summery dresses and going out clothes, but I feel like Thailand is an excuse for a completely different style. I have seen some funky cropped trousers that I will be purchasing to take in my suitcase or backpack rather.
More gym clothes – I mean if anything is going to motivate you get back into the healthy living what better way than some sassy new gym pants. I looove the North Face Leggings from JD sports. I feel like all my gym clothes have gone loose (good thing I suppose) but slightly annoying when you are on a tight budget.
Last but not least pjs! Probably what I wear most honestly if I could live in my pj’s I 100% would. The first thing I do when I get home is pop them on and make a cup of tea. Having new pjs is perfect when you know you are having an at home pamper night. Then again when aren’t they perfect?
Pretty ok with my current shoes but I’d love to add some vans to my collection! The prices of vans are really quite good so I think they are definitely something that I will purchase in the next few months.
Since coming home from university, I’ve really disliked my room so I’ve decided it’s time for a fresh makeover. My mother won and got to do the kitchen makeover first (which is an extenstion) so it’s going to take around 5 weeks. Once that is out the way I’m re-doing my room and already have the perfect vision in my head.
I will do some more posts when it comes to my new room.
Ok ok so probably the most important yet most expensive, a new cannon camera is definitely on the cards. I just haven’t quite worked around my boyfriend yet he has agreed to get me one for my birthday but October feels so far away. In the meantime, I want some polaroids to start adding to my memory collection.
Can anybody recommend places / websites to get polaroid pictures from?
I used to be a huge lipstick lover. My go to colour was a ruby red, but I had a change of heart earlier this year and became a gloss only kinda girl. So my new favourite lipstick is the Urban Decay – Rouge A Levres- Sheer.
Hi Guys and Dolls, firstly let’s get the dribs and drabs out of the way a little bit about me.
I’m an award winning journalist, having studied at the University of Salford I have been fortunate enough that I have gained a lot of experience in a range of things from broadcast journalism to network marketing. Continue reading →
I can’t believe all the planning and organising is over! I planned the autism event for several months and a lot of my time and effort went into it. As the event got closer I couldn’t wait for it to be over so I could have some ‘me’ time again. Continue reading →